The Twisted Version of The Outsiders OO
by WiltedRedRoses
Summary: Hello world! To summarize my happy little story which is still in progress! this is my friends and my twisted version of the outsiders! Pwease read it, it's my first story on here! And my bday was on Monday! THANX! YOU PLLZ ROCK!
1. Pony's Wonderful day!

The Twisted Version of the Outsiders!

Ponyboy's POV

When I stepped out from the darkness of school, I had only two things on my mind: how I would explain how I changed genders to Darry, and that I finally graduated kindergarten! I was the oldest kid in my class, 'cause they're all three years old and I'm five. I think… I was also thinkin' about Michael Jackson. He was tuff lookin'- and as for me well… I LOOK LIKE LINDSEY LOHAN! (A/N he actually sorta does OO') But I got '**_SOME'_ **good looks. I have bleached blonde hair, and scary murky eyes. They're this ugly greenish-grey.

Soda's POV

I walked into the house, head high and I knew what I had to do! Today I would spill my guts to Darry that I was gay! But I guess it'll have to wait, 'cause when I walk into the house I hear this soft sorta cryin' sound.

"Darry? That you?" I asked, switching the lights on. Whoa, Darry cried? I sat down on the couch, next to him.

"Oh it's horrible, just horrible!" he cried, "PONY'S 14 YEARS OLD AND HE'S STILL IN KIDNERGARTEN! And that's not the worse part; he thinks he's five years old!"

"Uh… Well at least he's potty trained!" I said sticking up for my 'lil bro. I think Darry died, 'cause he's all pale and there's foam comin' outta his mouth. Oh no! Darry died! That's wonderful- I mean horrible! I only make a penny a year! What am I gunna do! AHHHH!

"Darry? Dar? Dar bear?" I cried. At this point I was totally freaked out, and I started shaking his body like crazy, but then the worse thing possible happened. HIS HEAD FELL OFF! Oh God, Oh God, Oh God, what am I gunna do! What the **_hell _**am I gunna do! I know! I'll glue his head back on! But wait where's the glue!

So, now I'm on a search to find myself so glue, when I hear the door open. And my kid brother walks in.

"Hey guys- OMIGAWD!" yeah Pony screams like a girl… He starts runnin' 'round screamin' at the top of her- I mean his lungs!

"CALM DOWN PONY!" I yell. But he keeps on screamin' and runnin' into walls, so I do the one thing that seemed sensible! I grabbed a hammer! Then I bash him in the head a few times! See, just 'cause I 'aint bright doesn't mean I 'aint smart! Ha, ha! Success!

Anyways back to the glue for Darry's head. I look 'round for it, but can't find it. So I finally give up, WHEN ALL OF A SUDDEN! I find scotch tape in my underwear drawer, along with some thongs I forgot I had! Yeah!

So I run like a snail back to the livin' room, and tape Darry's head back. But I taped it on backwards! AND IT'S STUCK! Then Johnny and Dally walk in.

"HOLY SHITAKE MUSH ROOMS WITH MUSTARD! What happened to Pony and Darry!" Dally asked runnin' in, but accidentally tripped on Ponyboy, who was knocked out on the floor. Johnny fainted, and I think Dally hit his head too hard on the ground so he sorta just passed out.

"Dang…." I said, "Now what?" I blinked my eyes rapidly, and hit myself in the head with the hammer, for good measure.

Ponyboy's POV

"Ponyyyyy…. Pony…. Wake up…. Focus…. Llamas…" someone said, rollin' the words. My head hurt real bad, and I felt really dead. What happened? Oh yeah, Darry's head fell off, Soda hit me in the head with a hammer, and I died.

"Wow… Heaven looks like my house! I blinked, and looked up at someone who looked a lot like Dally. "Hey Dally… Are you God?"

"Uh… Last time I checked I wasn't, but who knows?" he said.

"Oh… Okay. How's Darry?" I asked, wondering what Dally would look like with bright pink hair…

"He died… Soda found this doctor guy. I dunno, Doctor Frankenstein something or another. Anyway he claims he can bring the dead back," Dally explained.

"Wait a minute…." I started, but then I heard the door swing open.

"Pony! You're alive! Yeah!" Johnny walked in. I think Johnny thought me and him were gay. "We're gunna go to a party like it was 1885!"

"Um…okay?" I blinked. "Should I ask Darry?"

"Nah, he's dead anyway," Dally shrugged.

"I thought you said someone was gunna bring him back ya know?"

"You mean like in those porn movies?" Johnny asked.

"No… Like some green dude who like died, but then this other dude wanted to bring him back… And he did, then they all died, and lots of fire," Dally explained.

"Ohhhh," Johnny and me said in unison.

"So where are we goin'?" I asked.

"Uh…. Let's just go to the movies," Dally said.

"Dokey," I shrugged, getting up.

…walking to the movies…

Johnny's POV'

Dally, Pony, and me were just walkin' to the Nightly Double, but were really early, so we were just walkin' around. I think Pony's really hott….

"Um… Johnny why are you staring at me, like that?" Pony asked.

"'Cause you're so pretty- I MEAN NOT AT ALL!" I screamed. Pony fell. "Er- sorry,"

"That's okay," Pony groaned.

"Aw, love!" Dally teased.

"I AM NOT GAY!" I cried.

Dally's POV

Pony said he knew some short cut to the movies, but he got us totally lost. So were went lookin' for someone to tell us how to get there. We ran into some prissy little kids.

"Um hi… Can you tell me where we are? We got kinda lost," Pony told the kids. The little girl got real red in the face, and kicked him on the crotch. Pony started crying, so Johnny comforted his little soul. I looked at the little brat.

"What the hell are you lookin' at?"

"Nothing much obviously," I sneered. She scowled at me, and got all red in the face again… Oh no! DON'T HURT MR. TINKLES! But it too late, she kicked, and she kicked hard. Well that didn't go so well…

…later when they manage to get to the movies…

Pony's POV

I was still in A LOT of pain, especially when I sat down, but I made it through.


	2. EVIL PAPER BOY!

Hello! I've finally updated! Now for my own original twisted ideas! Pony gets invited to Michael Jackson's place! Oh and for Gilbert, no I'm not going to stop writing because _you_ don't like it. And thank you all for the wonderful reviews, with all your support I feel like the luckiest gal eva! Luv you guys!

Chapter One: EVIL PAPER BOY!

It was a warm, sunny, happy, gay morning in our house! And you'd never guess what happened next! I, Ponygirl- I mean Ponyboy walked out of the door to get the mail when the evil paper boy hit me in the head with the news paper and mail!

"OH SORRY DUDE!" he yelled riding off! Of course being a sensitive fragile woman- er I mean guy! I fainted dramatically and hit my head harder on the soft, wooly, fluffy carpet!

"Oh no Pony died!" my brother Sodapop Curtis sobbed. "Oh well I gotta get me some more chocolate cake!" So Soda did get his cake, but of course at the sudden moment he became extremely allergic to chocolate and he started turning pink! Oh well serves him right for leaving poor me! Oh yeah and I woke up like the next day or so on the carpet…

"I got mail!" I cried. "I've never gotten any before, wonder who it's from?" So I tried to rip the envelope open, for he had seen this done many times before!

I can do this! I can do this! Who knew opening an envelope would be SO hard! Oh I know I'll ask Larry- I MEAN DARRY! So he did! How did he do it! Anyways… Now to see what is inside this envelope!

"You got mail?" he asked.

"Yup!" I grinned, and then his head fell off again. So I carefully open the little slits of the envelope, ouch paper cut! And take out the puertyful paper of words! AND- oh chopsticks I can't read!

"SODA! I CAN'T READ!" I cried. Why is Soda all pink!

"Chocolate Evil, chocolate evil, chocolate evil!" he cried.

"Um okay, what's your problem? SODA I CAN'T READ!"

" Ho, ho, ho I know how to read!" a scary chubby person who was really hairy with a scary puffy beard trotted in. AHHH IT'S SANTA CLAUS!

"TWO BIT! TWO BIT! TWO BIT! SANTA CLAUS IS HERE!" I screamed.

"OH MY GOSH WHERE! AHHHHHH SANTA! I'm your biggest fan can I get an autograph, pwease!" he cried.

"Ho, ho, ho! I know how to read!"

"Then read this, big butt!" I screamed, hitting him with a hammer. Then he exploded, and a scary little bald dude came out.

"Hello, I am Dr. Phil I am here to solve all your problems! AHHHHH I'M NAKED!"

"Hello Dr. Phil, can you read this?" I asked sweetly this time.

"Oh course I can! Let me see it!" So I handed him my letter. "cough, cough Dear, Mr. Little Boy- I MEAN Ponyboy Curtis you have been invited to my ever so gay Never Land! Please invite all your friends (especially if they're little boys!) and family!

-Michael Milk Jackson

Oh my gosh! I was invited to spend time with Michael Jackson! OMG! This is sooo amazing!

"Hey Dar, does this mean we can ride an airplane?" I asked.

"Ho, ho, ho!" laughed Santa, so good old Dally took out his machine gun and blew his head off!

"Dur……" and Darry died again.

"Well this sucks! How come he's always dieing?" Soda cried, blowing his nose in MY shirt.

(ON THE AIRPLANE!)

"Wow! We're on an airplane!" I cried, sticking my face on the window thingy.

"Where are we?" Darry asked, coming back to life.

"How do you that?" I asked, but then some scary green dead guy hit him in the head, and he died again. Sigh, what's new?

"Hey Pony! I can't believe you were invited to Michael Jackson's place! That is soooo awesome! And for inviting us all! I'm so grateful!" wow Johnny's all…happy?

"I like llamas!"

"OH MY GOSH YOU'RE SOOO HOTT!" some scary blonde chick ran up to Dally.

"Uh hi?" he said.

"I'm Paris Hilton! But you can call me…. Paris Hilton!" she snorted, wrapping her arms around his neck.

"Holy shitake mushrooms!" he yelled.

"Go Dally!" Two-bit laughed; he was drunk off lemonade…. Again. Sigh.

"Hello everybody, welcome to Coffee Express! Tonight we'll be riding to Michael Jackson's Neverland! Now make sure you don't put on your seat belts! And you can smoke all you want!" some scary flight attendant sung all sing-songyish. Very scary…. But oh well at least you can smoke! HURRAY!

I decided to walk around a bit on the air plane, since we got ourselves a personal jet! Isn't that awesome? (A/N It looks like the one Austin Power's is on in International Man of Mystery if you've ever seen it)

First I took a look at….the bathroom! And I found Steve and Soda kissing… It was pretty scary….. And uh- why our there llamas dressed as flight attendants? Oh dear, I wonder who's driving this thing!

"JOHNNY! I THINK WE'RE ALL GUNNA DIE!" I sobbed.

"Let's ask plank!" he said, holding up the scary little plank this he always has around him, with the scary little face drawn on it… (A/N er- from Ed, Edd, and Eddy the scary bald Johnny freak person with the scary plank)

"Plank!" Two-bit ran into the bathroom, and of course knocked Steve and Soda down.

"Everybody return to the main part of the plane thingy!" the llama-attendant said.

"What's goin' on?" asked Darry, who just woke up.

"I don't know?" I said. But then My Humps start booming from the wall! And we all started dancing to the most awesome song on the planet! So then we decided we should have a dance off! So of course Darry was the judge, because he couldn't dance without having his head fall off.

SO…. How will the dance off go? Who'll win? With llamas flying the plane and drinking coffee will they make it to Neverland. What does Michael Jackson have planned for poor, poor Pony? All questions will be answered next time, in THE TWISTED VERSION OF THE OUTSIDERS! Like omigosh! Also if you're going to flame please tell me how to write it better rather then just saying it was terrible. And I was personally insulted because my friends and me wrote this, so when I read the flame it was very rude. So please be less rude and more detailed. Thanks!


	3. Pony's TimeOut part 1

TWISTED!

Hey again! XD Yes this is a twisted story…. And it gets worse! So hold onto your seats and crackers folks we're in for a long ride!   
…………………………………………………………………………………………….

Ponyboy's POV

It's… so… SHINY! Ohmigosh everything is all… SHINY! I like the shiny! Er- let me back up my story! It all started…. fives years later and here we are in Never Land! I can't believe my llama feelers- I MEAN EYES! I cannot wait to meet Mr. Michael Milk Jackson! This is the best day of my life! Well for me at least… We kinda lost Darry's head… Oh wait no some freak dude who looks like Michael Jackson has it…. HOLY CRACKERS IT IS MICHAEL JACKSON!

"Uh…. Dur…. Chi…. Now…. Wow….." And with that I fainted…. But when I woke up I was bald! So I quickly grabbed my handy dandy glue bottle from my pants… Oh shoot it exploded…. No wonder I'm all sticky! I thought I wet myself again! Dur… Anyways so I used whatever glue that was in the bottle and put it on my head and than I stuck the hair on! Well it didn't really work… So I decided to get a wig! But the question is: When you're in the strange land of a strange person and your bald and naked how does one get a wig? Well that was the question so let's get an answer! Uh… What was I saying again? Something about ducks? OH MY GOD I'M BALD! Oh yeah that twas it… Then suddenly a strange little light appeared!

"My name is Fairy Barbie Queen and I come from Michael Jackson's chest of treasures…. And I'm here to grant thee a wish," she said. Hmmm a wish… Yes this could be useful, but what to wish for… Think… Think…. Think… I've always wanted a pet pony…. But the last pet I had ended up being friend on the grill poor Dinky!. Well then again I've also really wanted Hilary Duff's newest CD… But uh maybe not… Oh wait I need a wig!

"Uh wig?" I asked.

"Magico Prestico AllaCazaam give me a roast turkey and a bucket off ham!" she cried and a moment later all those weird things came.

"I said a wig not… that," I frowned.

"Oh? Well to bad!" and with that she took the turkey and put it on my head and then put a few pieces of ham on top.

"But I look like sandwich!" I cried.

"Here," she took off a pink bow and tied it to the turkey's leg, "Now you look hot!" Then she left and I was stuck with a roasted turkey, ham, and a bow on my head. I tried to take it off but it was seriously stuck!

"Uh a little help here!" I cried in agony. And then I remembered the glue! It was extra sticky I can't even take off my paints! Aw man! How come this kind of thing only happens to me! I pulled and I pulled until the stupid bird came off. Then magically it came back to life and flied away.

"Bye, bye birdie," I sobbed going back to my search for a wig. When I suddenly found Michael Jackson's collection of noses! And under that a wig cabinet! I found this really hot afro so I put that on! Oh will Dally be ever so jealous! Just then my brothers walked in… WITH MR. MICHAEL MILK JACKSON! Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh! I was so totally freaked out that I started screaming really loudly and running into the walls. And then I remembered the hammer incident… So I stopped.

"Oh hey look Darry found his head! Hurray!" I smiled.

"Hello little boy- I mean Ponyboy! Just my lunch another wonderful little boy- I MEAN GUEST! Uh… here have a cookie!" he handed me a cookie and I threw it in his face.

"Lunch…" Soda repeated looking like he shouldn't be here.

"Hey you wasted a cookie!" Darry cried, "HOW COME I DIDN'T GET A FRIGGEN COOKIE! HUH! AT LEAST I'M HAWT! AND I'M LITTLE BOY INSIDE!" Everybody stared at Darry for a really long time and then his head fell off so we turned our attention back to Michael Jackson. Oh no… I threw the cookie at his nose… IT FELL OFF!  
"You little cracker jack! You nose murderer! HOW COULD YOU! I'M RUINED!" Michael Jackson sobbed. I just stood staring there. "GUARDS!" he screeched. And then suddenly scary flying monkeys from The Wizard of Oz flooded in and took me by the arms and dragged me out of the room.

"PONY!" I saw my brother Soda put out his arm and start acting all dramamatic but he didn't help…

"AHHHHHHH!" I screamed really loud and tried to bite the guy but the dude just bit me back! And then suddenly I felt something funny on my head. Oh hey my hair grew back… OH NO! I have glue on the afro! GAWR MY HAIR! But who cares I think I see Dally and Johnny coming up!

"JOHNNY! DOBBY- I mean- DALLY HELP ME!" I cried. Dally was high on cereal and Johnny was playing with a plank….. WHAT THE HECK! After a lot of kicking and screaming we came to a huge door that read, "TIME-OUT CENTER!" This was rather awkward because they threw me into a very pink fluffy room… On the ground there were little pink ducks and Barbies… But that wasn't the worst part! TELETUBBIES CAME OUT OF THE OVER DECORATED DOORS!

"Tinky Winky! La La! Dipsy! PO! Teletubbies! Teletubbies! It's time to hello! Uh oh!" they squealed in unison. By now I was in tears and I was trying to get out! But then they took a huge circle floaty and put it around me so I was stuck!

"Let's bury him in beany babies!" one of the horrible creatures cried evilly.

"HELP! ANYBODY! HELP ME!" I was totally freaking out. And I was screaming my brain out so they stuffed a cookie in my mouth! But the cookie was old and hard so I could break it! What can I do?

To be continued!


End file.
